Why I work at Playworks

I worry.  It’s a specialty of mine since my son was born last April.  Here is a short and by no means comprehensive list of things I worry about.         

 

1. That he will get sick
2. That he’ll fall and hurt himself
3. That I’ll drop him
4. That he will ingest something poisonous
5. That someone will steal him
6. That I am a really bad parent
7. That I am causing some psychological damage that I can’t even imagine right now
8. That our house will burn down and I won’t be able to get to him
9. That wolves will find their way into our house and eat him
10. That he will grow up and leave me

I guess these are the things all new parents worry about--physical and emotional safety.  We can’t help it.  Babies are so vulnerable, so easy to damage, so desirable for thieves, so toothsome to wild wolves.

The worries speak more of my fears and insecurities than of any real danger my son faces.  As parents, we’re scared of all the harm the world may inflict on our children, scared of the harm we will inevitably inflict, and yet there’s no way to guard against these risks.  

We can’t raise our kids in a bubble, or give them away to expert nannies in order to avoid psychological damage.  Our children must fall down and bruise themselves, must experience pain and loss, must try new things and take risks, and they must learn to live with us as their parents.  It’s a painful process, but necessary.  We try to keep the risks to a minimum, but at some point, we’re supposed to work ourselves out of a job.  Our kids are supposed to become adults and leave us.  

Even now, the little bit of growing up he’s done has made my son more independent, less reliant on me.  He’s taking small steps towards the door, and the pain of it is only a little less than the joy.

I work at Playworks because it’s something I can do to make the world into a less worrisome place.  I don’t fight disease, or catch baby thieves, or correct psychological damage, but I do have an impact.  

My job makes a difference for 3,400 kids in Salt Lake City.  I help our office stay up and running and provide support for our coaches who spend their time out on the playground making sure school is safe, healthy, and fun.  Because of them, kids get bullied less, they are kinder to each other, they see school as a positive place.  

Because of them and because of me, the world is better.  I work at Playworks for my son, because the world should be as good as I can make it for him, and because I want him to see that this is my job, that we care for each other.  That’s what we do as human beings.  I want him to understand that things can get better, that he can make a difference just like I do, that this is what it means to grow up.